Divya: Rahul, you put water in my eye!
Rahul: Well, just spit it out of your eye!
Mom (fascinated): Spit it out?
Rahul (correcting self): Well, just drop it out of your eye, Divya!
****
Rahul had his hand on the window (glass) of the car and was pressing the power-window button up, down, up, down, with the other.
Mom: Whatcha doin', Rahul?
Rahul: Nothing. Just giving my hand a ride.
****
Rahul: Is a documentary a dictionary on TV?
****
Divya: Are people the best animals?
****
Rahul (at 6 years of age): You look too cool, Mommy. Like a rock star!
****
Dad (loading the dishwasher): Rahul, can you bring the glasses from the living room?
Rahul (cheekily) brings his eye glasses that he hates to wear.
****
Lekha: Do you want pepperoni? Or pepper only?
****
Divya: If you eat yourself, will you be inside out?
****
Rahul (at 5&1/2 years of age; impatient for Mom's attention to turn to him): It is boring to hear about Lekha's and Divya's dreams. It is fun when you listen to my dreams.
****
Rahul: Is that a thinking job or a doing job?
****
Rahul: What is that thing in the hotel room that you and Daddy kept your computer?
Mom: A safe?
Rahul: Yes, and I think my memory is in a safe.
****
Sunday, November 3, 2013
Kid speak -- Part One
Friday, November 1, 2013
The Ethics of Aesthetics
The caption says, "30 unique photographs from 1959. Christian Dior in Moscow."
And somehow these photographs make me sad, sad, sad. Audrey Hepburns
strategically inserted into the pages of 'Soviet Woman' for the sole reason of breathing life into the Hepburns alone. No give; just take.
Perhaps not as obviously stark and troubling as malnourished, bow-legged, rheumy-eyed children in remote villages serving as backdrop extras, but the ultimate effect belongs in the category of deprived people serving as props to sell a lifestyle that they could not attain at that time and in that space.
The cringe-worthiness is made worse when I wonder, 'Did they know exactly what they were doing? Or did they not?'
Which is more troubling?
Monday, October 28, 2013
Mounds
By Lekha, age 11.
Halloween. Scary costumes and candy. There are tons of candy choices at the store that it's a chore to pick. What will you buy? I'll make it easy for you: Mounds.
I won't go on an on about the obvious, how Mounds are the best candy in the world, but I'll tell you why. Mounds are the most delicious, mouth-filling, sweet, chocolaty candy in the universe! Everyone loves Mounds. There are different flavors like: milk chocolate and white chocolate, but I personally think the dark chocolate ones are the best. Dark chocolate is very healthy, and these types of Mounds are filled with coconut which adds a sweetly unique touch of flavor.
If you are an adult, go ahead and treat yourself to the rich, creamy chocolate! If you are a kid, go to your parents right now and beg them for Mounds or money to buy them. They make the best snacks.
Again, everyone enjoys Mounds. Although I would recommend them to children mostly. Mounds are the perfect Halloween candy to give out. The moment you drop the lovable treats into their bags, their impatient faces will melt into smiles at the deliciously tempting candy.
So in my opinion, as you already know, Mounds are the most fabulous, mouth-watering, tasty, craving pick. If you don't believe me, go ahead! I know this very well. That Mounds are the ultimate Halloween treat!
Saturday, August 31, 2013
Speaking in silences
Ketaki Chowkhani reflects on her experiences teaching caste in an upper caste school on Round Table India. An 18-year old, 12th grade student approached her to help him out with a project on caste. According to Chowkhani, the student, who was from an upper caste community, went to a school with only upper caste, and mostly middle class, students and teachers. Chowkhani was familiar with the school and its politics since she had studied there herself. "No one ever talked to us about caste there," she says. "There was a resounding silence around it." Chowkhani explained to the student that no one talked about caste in the school spaces because everyone was upper caste.
"This was of course, because caste was believed to be ascribed to only lower castes and Dalits and not upper castes, and that they seemed strangely absolved of any caste identity. The middle class, upper caste idea of castelessness was the prevalent norm there."While I like how she explains the upper castes' version of castelessness, I disagree that no one talks about caste in places where upper caste privilege dominates. I have a slightly different take, hearing as I do, unintended, ubiquitous caste talk on all sides. Such conversations, seemingly innocent, involve foods, culture, festivals, bhajans, favorite singers, beloved music genres, party invitations, temple matters, gods and goddesses, thread ceremonies, mantras, planet positions, auspicious days, saints, holy books, scriptures, modern pilgrimages, who's who, favorite colleges, cool schools, professorial uncles' experiences, mannerisms, dialects, writings, readings, love stories, marriage ceremonies, naming ceremonies, thread ceremonies, death ceremonies, ideas of humor, preferences in silk, taste in jewellery, concept of beauty, cousins with US visas, nieces with IIM degrees, aunts bringing marriage proposals, grandfathers earning PHDs -- all topics that simultaneously exclude me, my kind and many more.
So I assert that people engage in caste talk all the time without being aware that they engage in caste talk all the time. "How?," you may ask.
I can explain but you have to promise to experience my world, to carry my baggage, whole-heartedly, in order to understand.
Let me put it this way:
Have you ever fasted? When you are fasting, especially in the beginning when you are learning how to fast effectively, have you ever thought to yourself that there are too many references to foods, beverages, aromas, food rituals, eating practices and routines in a normal day? Have you ever wondered how it is that you did not pay attention earlier to how often food innocently confronts you in your everyday life?
Likewise,
If you are a vegan who obsessively tries to avoid animal products, do you not find animal-based ingredients in every food label, restaurant offering, and meat-eating culture's norms?
Caste is like that.
Just as,
Atheists can tell that our societies rely on too many God-based cultural references;Only a person born not into upper caste can tell you how many cultural norms and expectations are unavailable to him or her.
People struggling economically can understand that middle-class lives are full of activities that are money-based and consumption-based; that middle-class worries revolve around issues that matter only for those with some money;
Orphans can see that too many stories are rooted in mother's love and father's care;
Rationalists notice the extent to which superstitions rule all our lives;
Girls recognize exactly when boys have it easy;
The homeless in the city see buildings galore and yet know which doorways are off-limits to them and which benches in which parks are safe to sleep in;
Street children of the perpetually hungry can find perfectly edible foods thrown into garbage bins,
When you are lower caste but move in upper caste circles, caste tends to be talked about under the umbrella of culture. Rarely do we seem to notice or pay attention to it, at least not until major life events such as college admissions, marriage, babies, in-law visits take over lives. In fact, people seem to not even be aware of this social capital that they have been given, without asking. Yet caste culture is omnipresent to those on the outside, living in the margins, looking in from the fringes through walls that let you see, watch, observe. But not touch, mingle, blend.
Walls. Glass walls. Fragile glass walls. Yet, walls.
Thursday, July 11, 2013
July 11th
It's that fateful day again.
I am lost, simply spent.
Drenched in despair,
Soaked in sadness,
My womb, literally,
Bleeds and bleeds
Its inside out.
To hell with
"No right
To mourn your fourth (that never quite was)
In a crowded world."
My world is half-empty
Even though
Only one corner
Of a tantalizing hexad
Was snatched.
Friday, June 7, 2013
A new koan for our facebook age
Our new universe
The facebook universe
Requires
Brand new koans.
Here are a few
To ask our friends
At our next
(Facebooked) dinner party.
Does our fried calamari
Not exist
If picture not flashed?
Have we really, truly eaten
If we dine, in full obscurity,
At Olive Garden?
If we shop at
Schaumburg Mall
After announcing the fact,
Do we have
To pay the store?
Should not we be paid
For advertising?
If we believe
That we are
The Perfect Family
It wouldn't mean anything, would it,
Without
The endorsement
Of our dear facebook friends?
If our happiness
Multiplies
With each 'Like' received,
Are we reduced to
'Zero' happy state
Without a respectable
Status update?
And what about the corollary?
Does our sadness
Not take a shape or form
If we give it
No facebook life?
Can this be true?
Can this be the promise
Of a new Zen way?
Sunday, May 26, 2013
HemaMalini (Vidyodaya, '86)
A year or so ago,
When I came across
A class photograph
From my past, I
Touched faces,
Saw smiles,
Heard distinct voices
Across the miles;
Across the months, the years
Of life that slipped away...
Like so much fine sand.
If the persons behind the faces
Switched off their TVs,
Shut out the traffic,
Turned down their chatter,
Quieted their families
For a moment,
Will they hear my thoughts?
I wondered.
Will they hear me whisper
"Hey, how are you doing?
Do *you* see my face too?
Do you wonder
Why I flashed in your mind's eye?
Can you hear me?
Did we connect?"
Yet, so busy that I was
Doing the asking,
Lining up the questions,
That I failed to
Listen
To the silence
That came away
From the corner
That I imagined
Held one classmate
Securely.
Turns out,
*I* didn't sit still enough
To recognize
That her voice
Was by then
No more.
R.I.P. HemaMalini.
October 6, 2012.